Police in Kensington, Canada, are getting serious about cracking down on drunk driving during the holidays. According to a post on the Kensington Police Service’s Facebook page, violators will get a hefty fine, driving suspension for a year and a little bonus gift: “playing the office’s copy of Nickelback in the cruiser on the way to jail.”
Yes, you read that right — the Prince Edward Island cops plan to bust tipsy holiday drivers with a mandatory sentence of listening to the Canadian rockers’ 2001 album Silver Side Up on the way to lockup. “So, the Holiday Season is upon us and that means more social events, staff parties and alcohol based libations,” the PD wrote in the “Kensington Police Drinking and Driving Gift — Christmas Bonus Edition” post. “Now, because of that fact, it logically means more people need to plan their nights driving duties. To save any problems at the end of the night, know ahead of time who is the Designated Driver. Write down the number to a cab company or plan to stay over at friends. Anything and everything you can do to eliminate the chances of drinking and driving.”
As for the Nickelback sentence on top of the criminal charge and the rest, the PD explained, “Now, now, no need to thank us, we figure if you are foolish enough to get behind the wheel after drinking then a little Chad Kroeger and the boys is the perfect gift for you. So please, lets not ruin a perfectly good unopened copy of Nickelback. You don’t drink and drive and we won’t make you listen to it.” (Check out the full Nickelback-threatening post here.)
“What we were trying to do is put a little humour into a very serious matter of drinking and driving,” Const. Robb Hartlen, the author of the post told the CBC. “What it does is it sparks that conversation, it pushes that idea that everybody knows with a little bit of humour… Poor Nickelback. They take the brunt of a nation’s joke, and I’m sure they’re crying all the way to the bank,” added Hartlen, an admitted fan of a few of Chad and the gang’s songs.
And before any of you Nickelheads get bent out of shape, Hartlen fessed up that he just pulled the image of the album from Google and his department doesn’t even have the disc on hand. “I would have no problem at all getting hold of a copy of Nickelback and making that the musical play-along on the way in to chat with someone who’s been caught for drinking and driving,” he said.
Soon enough, the Kensington Police will have even more Nickleback material to work with — the band revealed on Tuesday (Nov. 29) that they are back in the studio working on the follow-up to 2014’s No Fixed Address.
— Nickelback (@Nickelback) November 30, 2016