As a longtime Grammy veteran, it's hard to say which currently popular activity distracts you from the show you're ostensibly reporting about more: live-blogging or trying to follow the Twitter barrage, even a not-that-big one. This year we chose the latter tack, and what follows is a completely subjective, often hilarious, hardly definitive selection of our favorite tweets from the show, from a ragtag collection of people in the industry we happen to be following. Consider it an alternate history of the 2011 Grammy Awards: It doesn't include every major moment but it's got most of them, and it provides a fun way to remember the show (and will seem completely bizarre to anyone who didn't see it). The tweets below are in chronological order - they don't highlight every major moment, but it shouldn't be difficult to figure out what was going on at the time. Thanks to everyone who unwittingly contributed -- and since the Grammys didn't say it, RIP Guru ...

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-- Sony Music Global
Checking out @Ricky_Martin on the carpet! Hotttttt #Grammys

-- MTV Buzzworthy
Oh dear. Is Ricky Martin in jeans? That is a straight-up Clint Black move. #grammys

-- David Carr
That's a whole lot of diva on that stage. Stay off of each other's skirts during the Aretha medley. ladies.

-- David Carr
Christina, the American viewing public forgives you for the Superbowl anthem.

-- Billboard
Ricky Martin: "Yes, I am seriously wearing these pants." Intro's @ladygaga . #grammys

-- Elliott Wilson
Born this way. Egg. I get it now! #sarcasm

-- Kanye West
I didn't know Howie Mandel was a part of Train

-- James Poniewozik by Chris Willman
People can rip on Gaga all they want, but that was a beautiful statement of support for all of us with shoulder horns. #grammys

-- Bill Werde
Spoke to a producer who works w eminem. said em wasn't so sure he'd have a big night. "You really think ppl will vote for me?"

-- Greg Kot
Whew, for a minute there I thought I was going to have to go an entire evening without seeing Ryan Seacrest #Grammys

-- Jon Caramanica

-- Angelica Cob-Baehler
Earlier this week I hugged @TinieTempah and today I kissed @LennyKravitz... I mean... #ilovemyjob

-- idolator dot com
And with one performance, Janelle Monae single-handedly revived the cape industry. #grammys

--Travis Fincher by jerees
She was at the VMAs covered in meat. Now she's at the Grammys dressed as an egg. Two more red carpets and Gaga will be a Denny's Grand Slam.

-- Nekesa Mumbi Moody
bruno mars and @JanelleMonae killed it at the Grammys ... they are amazing! and personally, think they'd make a cute couple. LOL

-- Missinfo
Lol, usher 1st told bieber "If its meant 2 b, we'll meet again"...that's called "the brush off"

-- Kanye West

--maura johnston
RT @allyzay: I'm w/@pareene - Usher should've come out sitting on an egg, from which Bieber emerged. #grammys #missedopportunities

-- Mikey Fresh
Get Ursh the oxygen tank

-- Missinfo
Cool, the girl from NCIS wore music notes on her dress to somehow make sense of her being at the grammys

-- Chamillionaire
Usher and JB. Wow!! That was ill.

-- Chris Willman
Okay, where are the Avett Brother Dancers?

-- MTVBuzzworthy
Bob Dylan sounds like he swallowed Leonard Cohen and Tom Waits.

-- Charles Aaron
civil war re-enactment folk, y'all! #Grammys

-- Jessica Hopper
Bob Dylan's voice is hitting the prime territory for fronting a death metal band.

-- annkpowers
Also, Dylan and Janelle Monae have the same shoes! #grammys

-- nathan followill
Watch the Grammys now. You may or may see me onstage in a few minutes. I f--king love Bob Dylan.

-- indielabelnews Charlie Dahan
Nice to see Fraggle Rock reunited for the Cee-Lo performance #Grammy. Someone tell Elton, Cee Lo stole his peacock outfit

--MTV Style
Gwyneth Paltrow just got a BILLION street cred points for dancing on a piano in stilettos. #Grammys

-- BorowitzReport Andy Borowitz by carr2n
Must be AWKWARD backstage between Katy Perry and the Muppets. #Grammys

-- Danyel Smith RT @zoforeman: Cee-lo Green says I will see your Alien and Mortal Kombat themes, and raise you Sesame Street.

-- Matador Records
no dis to the currently televised Katy Perry intended. But _this_is a pretty stunning performance [inexplicable link to video of Sonic Youth performing "Flower" in the Mojave Desert in 1985]

-- MTV Buzzworthy
I'm all for gender equality, but I just can't handle a man singing "Jolene." Unless it's a drag queen. #grammys #stfuandletnorahjonessing

-- Kanye West
I didn't know Johnny Depp played guitar

-- Bill Werde
John Mayer looks a little like a. Enego Montoya from Princess Bride or B. Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean

-- drakkardnoir Drizzy Drake
Hilary from Lady Ant looks so right up there!!! I'm very aroused.

-- David Carr
Collectively, wan Grammy performers could learn a lot from Eminem's willingness to show up and try your guts out. A pleasure to behold.

-- RapRadarDotCom RT @YOUNGSAFE: If i was the biggest selling artist of the last decade, i wouldn't be that angry. #JustMe

-- Fave by Danyel Smith
BEST NEW ARTIST ESPERANZA SPALDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #GRAMMYS #UPSETOFTHECENTURY

-- John DeCicco by indielabelnews
RT @AntDeRosa: Bieber fans are headed to some teen version of Tahrir Square right about now.

-- Kanye West
R.I.P to GURU!!!

-- Jon Caramanica
Twice RT @armedrobbery: Mick Jagger better spit Guru's "DWYCK" verse

-- Kanye West
Damn... I can't find the words to explain how I feel about the best new artist award... Don't wanna say the wrong thing

-- Eric Alper
To the Mick Jagger haters: Let's see how well YOU move when you're 67. #Grammys

-- Jonathan Wald by carr2n
First social media ruins Egypt's dictatorship, now the Grammys.

-- TheRealJordin Jordin Sparks
BABS!! :)

-- Jon Caramanica
Can't wait for Travis Barker to come out mid-song and just kill it [during Streisand's performance]

-- Will Hermes
Rihanna MVP #Grammys

-- Missinfo
Remember Hov n Bey's "crazy in love" chemistry? RiRi n Drake r tryin' 2 tell u something ; )

-- Chris Willman
Well, you can say this about the show: There was a lot of pyro.

-- Greg Kot
Arcade Fire turn Month of May into an assault that Lemmy would love. Young brother Will screaming like he's burning alive #Grammys nirvana.

-- Eric Alper
#Grammys Album of the Year: Arcade Fire's The Suburbs. Holy smokes. Oh Canada.

-- Merge Records
Congrats Arcade Fire!

-- Arcade Fire