Katy Perry has a conundrum: She's hung up on a guy who's not returning the favor. What better way to kiss-off than with a diss? "You don't eat meat, and drive electrical cars/ You're so indie rock it's almost an art, you need SPF-45 just to stay alive/Ur so gay and you don't even like boys." The Los Angeles singer/ songwriter likens herself to Lucille Ball's love child with Freddie Mercury—perhaps Mika's female counterpart? Blender and Teen People are already hip to the 22-year-old Perry (deliciously, the daughter of two pastors) and with major label support, including production credits on upcoming full-length from Glen Ballard, Dave Stewart and Butch Walker, "Ur So Gay" has all the potential to amuse the masses. A dance remix is ripe and ready for clubs—where gays are bound to embrace it—but top 40 programmers actually have an ace to fluff up the airwaves. "Gay" is just too good to play solitaire. —Chuck Taylor