These are, literally, the 50 most popular songs about sex ever, as based on each song's performance on the Hot 100 chart.
"Afternoon Delight" - Starland Vocal Band
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for two wks (7/10/1976)
The naive melody and wide-eyed harmonies of this '70s pop classic, which was famously covered in Will Farrell's 2004 "Anchorman" film, sound sweet enough to soundtrack a church picnic. In reality, the song is a lunchtime booty-call between a hungry man and his tasty morsel back home. Sounds like our kind of snack.
Sexiest lyric: "Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ingite/ And the thought of rubbin' you is getting so exciting"
"Candy Shop" - 50 Cent feat. Olivia
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for nine wks (3/5/2005)
50 proved he was a lover, as well as a fighter in this salacious rap duet with former G-Unit diva Olivia. 50 sweetly works up his lover's desires with sugary innuendos that would make Willy Wonka blush.
Sexiest lyric: "I'll take you to the candy shop, I'll let you lick the lollipop"
"The First Night" - Monica
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for five wks (10/3/1998)
These days, 29-year-old Monica is a proud mother of two. But when the R&B singer was a teenager, she was preaching abstinence. Although tempted to go all the way on the first date, the Atlanta native responsibly practices self-restraint atop this Jermaine Dupri-produced track.
Sexiest lyric: "Boy this evening, was it only me?/ Feeling completely, down to be open ... for some satisfaction/ Didn't want to say yes, for fear of your reaction"
"Ring My Bell" - Anita Ward
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for two wks (6/30/1979)
Anita Ward's 1979 disco hit became a dancefloor favorite for its memorable, sing-songy chorus -- but there's nothing roundabout about the song's lyrics, which are about what happens when her man gets back from a hard day.
Sexiest lyric: "Well lay back and relax while I put away the dishes/ Then you and me can rock-a-bye/ You can ring my be-e-ell"
"Promiscuous" - Nelly Furtado feat. Timbaland
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for six wks (7/8/2006)
Timbaland plays a seductive, bass-heavy game of cat and mouse with Nelly Furtado in this monstrous 2006 jam. Thomas Crown and Steve Nash get caught up in the steamy flirtation, but we're still left wondering if anybody scored at the end of the night. What a tease.
Sexiest lyric: "I can see you with nothing on/ Feeling on me before you bring that on"
"You're Makin' Me High" - Toni Braxton
Hot 100 Peak: 1 (7/27/1996)
Toni Braxton is singing about her sexual desires for a far-away lover on this mellow, suggestive track, but verses like the one below make the song seem like an endorsement of self-stimulation. If you can't be with the one you love ... love yourself?
Sexiest lyric: "I can imagine you touching my private parts/ With just the thought of you, I can't help but touch myself"
"I Want To Sex You Up" - Color Me Badd
Hot 100 Peak: 2 (6/8/1991)
With its new-jack-swing groove and tender falsetto vocals, CMB made sexual healing sound as gentle as can be. And as "Mr. Schue" recently proved on "Glee," covering this song is still the ultimate way for nerdy guys to get their crush's attention.
Sexiest lyric: "Let me take off all your clothes/ Disconnect the phone so nobody knows, yeah"
"Bad Girls" - Donna Summer
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for five wks (7/17/1979)
Donna Summer's strategy was to become the undisputed dirty diva of disco. She helped her cause with this booty-movin' plea for hooker respect, which came complete with trumpets bleating like a john's car horn. Bad girl, indeed.
Sexiest lyric: "Friday night and the strip is hot/ Sun's gone down and they're about to trot/ Spirit's high and they look hot/ Do you wanna get down?"
"Lollipop" - Lil Wayne
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for five wks (5/3/2008)
Candy metaphors in music go back at least as far as Little Richard ("Tutti Frutti," now what's THAT song about?) but Lil' Wayne raised the bar in this track about his lover's, er, oral fixation. Lest you think he isn't a gentleman, Wayne devotes a verse to returning the favor.
Sexiest lyric: "Shawty wanna hump/ You know I like to touch your lovely lady lumps"
"Honky Tonk Women" - The Rolling Stones
Hot 100 Peak: 1 for four wks (8/23/1969)
The Rolling Stones managed to mix sex and drugs with its rock n' roll in this nod to ladies of the night. Keith Richards' loose fretwork and Mick Jagger's loose lips pay respect to loose women everywhere.
Sexiest lyric: "I laid a divorcee in New York City/ I had to put up some kind of a fight/ The lady then she covered me with roses/ She blew my nose and then she blew my mind"