Mary J. Blige has always been candid about her hardships, and her interview for VH1's "Behind the Music," which premiered Sunday (July 24), was no exception. The 40-year-old singer spoke about being molested at the young age of 5 yrs. old and battling alcoholism through out the earlier days of her career.
"When I was five years old I was molested," Mary J. Blige said. "I remember feeling, literally, right before it happened, I just could not believe that this person was going to do this to me. That thing followed me all my life.The shame of thinking my molestation was my fault. It led me to believe I wasn't worth anything."
Blige later turned to alcohol and developed an addiction that almost ended her life. "It was bigger than me and it was definitely going to kill me. "So I was like, 'this is it [then] let's go.' I remember sitting on my bed. I swear, I don't know what death feels like but I felt like my spirit was trying to leave my body."
Blige credits her husband, Kendu Isaacs, with helping her sober up. "It was really hard. But, I care so much about him, I didn't want to be just this alcoholic burden on him. He doesn't deserve for me to be some, you know, slum-bucket alcoholic. So I took responsibility and I cleaned up as much as I could. But it was hard."
Blige has since seen brighter days, garnering a handful of Grammys for recent albums "The Breakthrough" (2005) and "Growing Pains" (2007). The singer's tenth studio album, "My Life II... The Journey Continues," is due out Oct. 4. Mary is also starring with Tom Cruise in the film "Rock of Ages," which hits theaters next year.